Football Sucks Happy Thanksgiving

OK so in lieu of my title today.
Last night I worked customer service and I had a customer as me about a Football game he was betting on. I smiled at him with a vacant look in my eyes. He offered to explain the game to me. I told him I understood the premise of Football, I just didn't like the sport very much.
You would think I punched him square on the nuts with that comment...
OK Folks I will NOT apologize.
Instead I will explain Football to you all.

OK a Bunch of guys ( and the odd chick but god knows why she would want to be there) gets dressed up in more pads then those inflatable sumo wrestlers, while in the shower they towel whip each other in ass and discuss the length and activity level of their man hood, while scratching their heads wondering why it shrank after popping a few 'roid's.
Finally they get out on the field and check out the cheerleaders, they are yelling Go team Go, bouncing their pom pom's and flashing their panties.. all oddly endorsed by most high schools.
they then slap each others ass run out to the field.
then they huddle meaning Great big Group hug they discuss on how to get their oddly shaped ball through the other bunch of guys.
they discuss plays I think is the term they use.. what they are really doing is farting and giggling about the smell. finally they knock each others helmets and say a word and run into position.
then one guy has the ball between their legs another guy grabs it and they run.
until they are body slammed by 12-20 guys
then game stops play someone kicks the ball
then they run again
the whistle is blown cause someone ran the wrong way.
( Probably dizzy from the big squash fest that just happened)
they do this and count it as such.

a Down- is when they get the ball intioo the others zone.
a Touch down is when they hold the ball while its other othe others side
a field goal is when the guy actually gets the goal by athletic ability.. oddly that is usually by the smallest guy on the team.

Football is the dumbest sport ever...
OH Wait no WWE or UFC is equally dumb...
actually no, you know Wrestling is fake.
and UFC is just gay.. lets fight till one calls out failure....

No point to these sports...

But to many Football is a Thanksgiving tradition perhaps they should look up Geo Caching... basically urban treasure hunting all you need is a GPS and you go.
far more interesting then watching a bunch of overgrown apes try and squash each other.
No, Geo Caching isn't for everyone its a sport made to be played not watched!
and guess what? taking Steroids doesn't improve you.
Oh but wait you do need some intelligence to play...

anyhow
....

Yep, folks its Turkey Sunday and here I sit on my lazy ass typing away, should I be cooking the Turducken as I have it hawing in the fridge now? NO! I refuse too... OK I work in Grocery obviously I have to work T-day which is fine cause I like having the bird(s)
( In my case as we are having three in one)
Tomorrow in Brampton with my Dad :)
Guess whose cookin?
Did you guess Gord? YOUR WRONG! How about my Dad? Nope!
Snowflake offered to eat the bird raw, not too sure he is trustworthy!

happy Thanks Giving all.. and if your watching football today just know you could be outside geo-caching!